Traumatic event #1
When: Friday morning
I set Olive in her crib for her usual morning nap. Remington was on the couch completely zoned out by the TV. It was a perfect moment for me to run out and clean the car since we were carpooling with some friends to Idaho Falls later that day. I was outside for about 10 minutes before I came back in to check on the babies. I walked in the door and heard the most terrifying muffled, gurgling scream. I panicked. I didn't see Remington in the living room so I ran back to the nursery. Rem was standing by Olives crib, he was distraught, trying to talk to me and pointing into the crib. I looked in the crib and what I saw will forever be engrained in my brain. Olive had managed to pull her blanket (a light gauzy material Aden and Anais blanket) which she was tightly swaddled in when I put her down, up and around her face. It was tucked so tight around her entire head that with every attempted breath she was sucking the fabric into her mouth. I ripped the blanket off and she gasped for air. The color came back to her face and she was soaked in sweat.
I totally lost it.
Sobbing, I held her tight and all the "what if" scenarios began running through my head.
What if I had stayed out at the car longer?
What if I had wrapped her in a thicker blanket?
What could have happened?
I could have lost my baby girl.
She calmed down after a few minutes and I offered a prayer of gratitude.
I don't think I have ever felt so scared in my entire life.
Traumatic Event #2
When: Saturday evening
The next evening we decided to run to Walmart and grab a couple things from our shopping list and let Remington run out some energy. It was a low key trip, more of a get-out-of-the-house kind of thing. Remington walked alongside the cart, pointing out different things and talking in his cute little boy voice. We walked through the isles slowly so he could keep up. We ended up over by the baby clothes and I wandered off ahead of the family, looking at random items. A few minutes later David pulled up behind me and asked me if I had Remington. I assumed he was with him.
Where was he?
I panicked again.
We split up and I charged frantically through every isle calling his name.
He couldn't have gone far.
Once again the "what if" scenarios crept into my mind.
I couldn't even remember what he was wearing!
What if someone took him?
He's to little to tell someone he's lost!
My heart was racing and I was on the verge of tears.
5 minutes passed and I heard David calling my name a few isles over.
There Remington was, just hanging out in the office supply section, chilling like nothing had happened.
I scooped him up and held him tight.
I was an emotional momma mess.
I am sure there will be many more "close calls" in my future. That's how life goes with kids is right?
If anything, these events made me step back and appreciate the precious gift of life. I am truly blessed with a great one. Tonight, I will hold my babies a little bit longer and little bit tighter. I will breath in their sweet baby smells and kiss their soft baby cheeks because If anything were to happen, I never want to forget this.